Insecurities Given Form

“Oh… you’re back…” Arkadin sighed as he opened the door to be greeted by a very sticky Yisini. Her scales were glistening underneath a large amount of slime and goo that Arkadin couldn’t recognise and she stank of a fake, strawberry scent.

“I am! I came to make sure you are doing well!” Yisini basically let herself in. She thankfully wasn’t leaving a trail of slime but she was carrying that false smell with her. It quickly filled the room, assaulting Arkadin’s nostrils. He was glad he didn’t have to breathe.

With a frown, Arkadin closed the door then sat down at the dining table, opposite where Yisini had sat. He had no idea why Yisini was here and what she might say or do.

“Soooo!” Yisini smiled. “How you doing?”

“I’m alright,” Arkadin shrugged. “Just want to keep to myself. Did Epani speak to you? She wanted to ask of some stuff and asked me about it first for some dumb reason.”

The smile on Yisini’s face grew. “Oh, little one, we had an amazing time. Thoroughly enjoyable. Took her a while to get into the right rhythm but once she did…” Yisini trailed off, lost in pleasurable thought, before swiftly returning to the conversation. “Epani’s planning on popping by whenever she can now. She is coming by in about four hours. The offer is open to you, if you wish to join us.”

“For the billionth time, no…” Arkadin tutted. “I am not interested in sex.”

“But you aaaaaare!”

“I am not.”

“You are. You’re incredibly curious about it. You lie and say you’re not interested, but you want sex really badly.”

Arkadin closed his eyes and took a deep breath. “Please, don’t. Don’t go into this.”

“Why do you do this to yourself?”

“Because I hate myself. And if I hate myself, how can I truly love someone else and how can I expect someone else to love me back?”

Yisini shrugged, then got up and helped herself to a glass of water. “I don’t get beings that save themselves for the perfect one. Most beings never find what they are looking for and die cold and alone, just like you.”

“Oh thanks. When you said you were coming here to see if I was doing well, did you really mean you came here to insult me?”

“Not intentionally…” Yisini sat back down and leaned across the table. “But I can sense the desire inside you. It burns. It tears you up inside. You want it. You want it desperately.”

“Okay fine, you’re right, I do. But I can’t see myself actually going that far. And you’re not helping matters…” Arkadin was beginning to feel rather fatigued by all of this. He put his head in his hands, sighing. “A friend of mine once said that she felt far too powerful and nonsensical for who she was, described herself as a writer’s deepest desires put down on paper and given form. Sometimes I wonder if I’m the result of Kinisis’s insecurities given form.”

“Yeah, you totally are!” Yisini nodded in agreement. “I’m Kinisis’s lustful desires and the ability to do whatever the fuck I please. You’re the workhorse, the escaped slave filled with guilt whenever you’re not working. You’ll get over it one day though. And when you do, if you need help, I’ll be here for you. I’ll even guide you through your first time, if you want.”

“I… appreciate that, Yisini…” Arkadin sighed. “You’re just trying to help in your… own way.”

“You’re also welcome to join us tonight, if you wish!” the Allbirther beamed as she got up, ready to leave.

“I’m good, thanks.”

“You sure?”

“Yes.”

“Double sure?”

“Yisini…”

Yisini grinned, then swiftly left. “Oh well. You’re missing out…”