Waking Up On The Floor To Questions

“Hey, guys, I think he’s waking up!”

Arkay rubbed his eyes as he rolled over and picked himself up. Standing over him were his team of friends, plus an extra friendly face.

“So, which of them did you save this time?” Sini asked as she helped Arkay to his feet. “You were gone for a while.”

Nyssi, Tenuk and Retvik all glanced at Sini, not sure what she was talking about, but Kayel seemed to have an idea.

“How long?” Arkay frowned, not answering the question.

“About fifteen minutes. Plus two hours of being exhausted and asleep.”

“Huh. Not as good as last time, but a big improvement on the previous two times, I guess…” Arkay glanced around, suddenly remembering where he was. “Oh darn. I kinda ruined our Wards and Wyverns session. I know it was just session zero but I kinda wanted to go over a basic dungeon so Retvik could learn the rules.”

Sini crossed her arms and tutted. “You didn’t answer my original question.”

“What… what was your original question?” Arkay asked as he made his way over to the sofa. “And was I really lying on the floor for over two hours?”

“You got super impossibly heavy and we couldn’t move you!” Kayel protested. “Like, we all tried to move you together and all we succeeded in doing was moving your tail!”

Arkay frowned some more, then sighed. “Sorry about that. And I’m sorry about ruining the evening.”

“Why did you pass out?” Retvik whispered, still looking rather concerned. “It was… very sudden, and you seemed to know you were about to pass out.”

Arkay tutted, waited for everyone to join him on the sofas, then started to explain. “I’ve told you all about Litvir, Kuta’s brother, and other, on-fire Retvik, yes?”

Everyone nodded, including Sini.

“Well, it turns out I made a stupid promise to them, that I’d protect them and stop them from dying or being killed until we were reunited. Except us actually being reunited is impossible thanks to Sini and Epani-”

“Why have I made it impossible?” Sini snapped. “I promised your stupid telepathic monster boyfriend he’d get you back one day!”

Arkay eyed Sini. “You did?”

“Yeah.”

“Well that goes against the 20 billion years you want this universe to last. I can’t make Retvik and Litvir wait 18 billion years. Or 10 billion years. Or whatever.”

Sini shrugged. “You’re assuming that we don’t figure out a way to have death and decay without you personifying it and maintaining it in that time… Still, I’m getting you sidetracked. Start explaining.”

Arkay eyed Sini some more, tutted, then continued. “So yeah, basically, I made a promise I can’t keep, and now, whenever one of them gets into super serious trouble, I astral project to wherever they are, save their stupid asses then return to my body. Except it’s super painful, super dangerous and I don’t even know how I do it. This is the fourth time I’ve done it and I’m exhausted.”

“Yes, but who did you save? Retvik or Litvir?”

“Oh…” Arkay paused. “It was Retvik. There was a really massive, properly sentient corruption trying to kill him because corruption hates fire, that’s one of the best ways to kill it, and Retvik has fire powers. Hence why I often call him on-fire Retvik.”

“What do you call me?” Retvik asked.

Arkay looked Retvik up and down. “You’re just Retvik.”

“Oh.”

“Don’t take the lack of a nickname the wrong way. You’re the best Retvik, even if, technically, you’re the third Retvik I’ve somehow come across and made into one of my best friends.”

Retvik settled down, but Sini was suddenly quite surprised.

“What the fuck do you mean by a ‘third’ Retvik?” Sini screeched.

“Well, we’re the idiots who keep on reusing the same Time Drake, Kairos keeps on making timelines where new Retviks and Tenuks consistantly appear and I just somehow naturally befriend them!” Arkay was struggling to explain. “Turns out, the Tenuk from the universe I was born in, he is somehow still alive and is a Decay Lord! No idea how, but I guess, in my original universe, Kronospasts were magic-using demi-deities that were almost immortal because they descended from a Voidborn.”

“There… is more than one Tenuk?” Tenuk muttered.

Arkay turned to Tenuk and smiled. “There is, yes, but you are by far the bestest Tenuk of them all. You are also cute and fluffy and you act like a normal person rather than a horny bastard who always waited to the last moment to do the right thing.”

“So, uh, what actually happened?” Nyssi asked, changing the subject and desperately not wanting to know if there were other Nyssis or Kayels out there. “You turned into a ghost and sent yourself across the, uh, multiverse? And saved Kuta’s brother’s boyfriend?”

“Basically. I’ve saved both of them twice now. This time, I saved Retvik from some corruption. The first time, I saved him from an explosion at a Voidborn base that he caused. Litvir has the decency to not need saving that badly, the first time for him, he was just lost and I guided a nearby ship to where he was stuck. Second time saving Litvir, I thought it was a damn dream because all I remember is saving some strange, purple-plated Rethan from a giant snake monster that was trying to eat it…” Arkay trailed off. “Either way, everything is fine and dandy, Retvik’s safe, I saw some strange people, pretty sure I briefly piloted a 3m tall warframe or something, and now, uh… what time is it?”

Kayel glanced at his wristband. “7:30pm.

“Not that late. Maybe a bit late for a full session, but we can still go over stuff?” Nyssi suggested. “After all, we got all these snacks to eat, and Retvik still needs to learn the rules and Kayel could do with a refresher.”

“Do you guys mind?”

Retvik shrugged. “I was looking forward to learning how to be a small, fluffy wizard.”

“Hey, sorry to interrupt, but may I ask something?” Sini suddenly exclaimed.

“Uh, sure, what is it, sis?”

Sini inspected the table, which still had all the game stuff on it, then sighed. “This is going to sound really, really stupid but… can I join you in your Wards and Wyverns session?”

“You want to join us?” Arkay asked back.

“Yeah. Looks fun. Not something I normally do, and I do like to try new things. Would be nice to try something new that also didn’t involve sex or lust or whatever for a change.”

Arkay turned to his friends. “Are you… all fine with Sini joining us?”

“Why are you asking us?” Kayel blinked.

“I DID experiment on you all when I went mad with corruption…” Sini muttered. “I won’t do it again though. But I am genuinely curious about this game, and, well, I kinda want to get to know you all a bit better. Arkay included.”

Everyone glanced at each other. After a while, Retvik shrugged.

“I am personally fine with you, it will be nice to not be the only newbie playing the game, but only if you promise not to get slime everywhere!”

Sini grinned. “Don’t worry, I’ll clean up any mess I make. So, am I in?”

“Hah, yeah, you’re in!” Arkay smiled back. “Alright, sis, tell me, what sort of character do you want to play as?”