The four deities sat around the glass table, awkwardly looking anywhere but at Kinisis. The Allmaker was prancing around, naked as usual, rummaging for packets of biscuits and making sure that everyone had a drink. She’d for some reason also brought a sword along with her, a pretty basic-looking one made out of silver and steel.
“I wish you’d cover yourself sometimes…” Epani muttered as a bowl of milk appeared in front of her. “It is rather… difficult to have a conversation with you otherwise.”
Kinisis ignored her daughter’s request and continued arranging drinks. For Kairos, she handed him a golden goblet of mead. For Yisini, Kinisis conjured up a pineapple and strawberry sorbet, topped with strawberry heart slices and a large helping of white brandy. Arkadin received a simple glass of water.
“I kinda wanted an energy drink.”
“You’ve had seven today. No more.”
Arkadin tutted. “I’ve had two.”
“You have water and like it.”
The Thantophor sighed. Kairos glanced at him and shrugged, while the Allmaker finally sat herself down at the head of the table. She’d brought over five plates of various biscuits, as well as a bowl of peanuts for Yisini and some barbecued poultry wings for Epani.
“We all happy?”
“No.”
“Tough. Let’s start talking.”
“Why though?” Arkadin hadn’t been in a good mood for a couple of days now, and this meeting was making him feel worse. “We all know what’s going to happen. You’ll all bitch about how awful I am, I’ll try and defend myself and then Kinisis will trim my claws and pull out some of my teeth again, while pretending to be fair and balanced.”
The four other deities all looked awkwardly at each other while Arkadin sipped his drink. He knew they were telepathically talking to each other in a way he could not hear. He didn’t particularly care.
“Well…” Kairos started but didn’t finish.
“Well what? I get it. You all hate me. I don’t blame you. I take your things and slowly make them decay. I ruin your hard work. But that is how universes work. You can’t have creation without destruction. And right now, you’ve probably got the best side of me. A kind, quiet, caring death god who tries not to get in everyone’s way.”
Kairos threw his wings into the air. “I don’t know, little brother! I don’t know! I’m perfectly fine with you as you are. You do your job and that’s it. My only worry is that your formation of emotions might get the better of you, but I’d be a hypocrite if I were to suggest we strip you of feelings.”
Epani didn’t say anything, but she nodded her head, obviously agreeing with what Kairos was saying. Yisini though had other ideas.
“It’s not that I hate you, it’s just that you’re a pretty shitty death god. You care too little about death and too much about everything else.”
“Death is kinda boring though. There’s no one to talk to-”
“Which kinda proves the whole thing about emotions!” Yisini interrupted, not letting Arkadin finish.
With another tut, Arkadin sipped his drink. “So what, Yisini? What do you actually want from me?”
“I want you to be…” The Allbirther paused, thinking to herself. “You know what fascism is, yes?”
“Yes.”
“Well I want you to be a fascist’s perfect enemy. You get what I mean?”
“Not really…” Arkadin glanced at Kinisis. She hadn’t said anything in a while. “Enlighten me?”
Yisini smiled a little. “I need you to be weak and strong. I need you to be seen as an all-powerful enemy with tendrils in everything. But I also need you to be a weak, pathetic, cowardly enemy that we can one day defeat, assuming we all work together. I need you to be a destroyable target. Something to rally the troops against.”
Arkadin blinked. “I thought I already was. And frankly universe-wide fascism isn’t what we need right now. Or ever.”
“Oh, I’m not suggesting that. I’m just suggesting that you be the sort of enemy the universe needs.”
“I don’t want to be like that though…” Arkadin sighed. “I really don’t. I just want to do my job without this constant back and forth with you lot.”
“This back and forth will continue to happen as long as you exist the way you do, little brother!” Yisini snapped. “It’ll always be like this!”
“She does have a point…” Epani muttered. “None of us will be how we want each other to be. Most of the time, we do get along, but when we do fall apart, most of it is because of Arkadin…”
Yisini leaped out of her chair. “Exactly!” After a moment, she sat herself down again. “We’ll be doing this forever!”
The other deities all fell silent. Epani licked milk out of her bowl while Arkadin finished the rest of his glass of water in one swallow. They all turned to Kinisis, who still hadn’t said anything and was clearly thinking.
“Mother, what do you think?” Kairos finally asked.
Kinisis glanced at Arkadin, then wandered around the table to where she picked up her sword.
“You’re all right. This will go on forever. Unless we change some things.”
“You’re not going to declaw me again, are you?” Arkadin sighed.
“Nope.”
“So what are… ow…” The Thantophor spluttered as Kinisis forced the silver sword through his chest. Acidic blood splashed on the table, slowly eating away at the glass. The other deities quickly backed away, too scared to even attempt to help their sibling.
Kinisis removed the blade then stabbed it through Arkadin’s chest again, this time leaving it in place and watching curiously as the Thantophor slumped back in his chair. Once he was suitably unconscious, the Allmaker kicked Arkadin to the floor and began to drag him away.
“Clearly there’s only one real solution! To make a new death god!” Kinisis beamed. “You three stay here, I’m going to need your input on this…”