Grineer Blender

“Do you guys ever feel like we should kill less?” Volt asked as he deployed several electric shields, giving Ember some cover while she hacked a console. The bullets of two Heavy Gunners vaporized instantly as they hit the electric shields. How, Volt was never really sure.

Ember cursed loudly as she realised she’d forgotten to bring ciphers again. She’d used them all two missions ago and had been meaning to stock up, but as always, she’d been distracted. “What? I fucking HATE Grineer consoles!”

Volt deployed a second shield, then nudged Ember to one side and did the hack himself. Once he’d finished, the sirens quietened down and the doors all switched from orange to green. Lockdowns were always more of a pain on Corpus ships, but lately the Grineer were doing them too.

“What’s taking you both so long?” Frost shouted through their comms. “I’m already at the damn terminal!”

“Sorry, Ember can’t hack and they decided to lock the doors…” Volt tutted as he activated his Speed. Ember grabbed the data mass she’d left on the ground while she’d tried to hack and chased after Volt, causing small, fiery explosions as she did so. Frost was only a couple of rooms away and he had already deployed a snow globe to protect the terminal they needed to hack.

Frost grunted, then snatched the data mass from Ember and shoved it into the terminal. “One minute and thirty seconds. Every time.” With a tut, Frost chucked a spike of ice at an incoming Grineer, then shot another in the face with his Tigris Prime shotgun.

“I wonder what that Grineer was thinking just as those Tigris pellets blasted into his skull?” Volt mused to himself as he threw up some more electric shields, just because he could.

“What?” Ember asked. “What are you on about?”

“I dunno…” Volt shrugged. “Sometimes I just don’t feel like committing mass murder.”

“Mass murder?” Saryn popped up out of nowhere. She’d been looking for some seeds as part of her Syndicate stuff. “Who said anything about mass murder?” After that very sentence, Saryn pulled out her Scoliac whip and killed ten Grineer who just happened to be running towards her.

“You just killed ten Grineer…” Volt pointed out. “My technical legal knowledge ain’t exactly good, but isn’t mass murder the death of four or more people?”

“Does it matter?” Frost snapped. “They are trying to kill us!”

“We broke into their ship and started uploading things to steal their data!” Volt countered. “They think we’re the bad guys here.”

Frost tutted, then twiddled his thumbs as the data mass did its work, pausing occasionally to shoot at Grineer running towards them.

“It’s like a Grineer blender…” Ember muttered. “They know we’re here and they just run to their deaths and die. They probably know it’s a suicide mission, yet they’re programmed to just do as they’re told. It’s sad, really.”

Saryn though didn’t seem to care. She haphazardly killed any Grineer who so much as glanced in her direction. “Well maybe if they weren’t trying to shoot us, we wouldn’t have to kill them. It’s not like runaway Grineer don’t exist. They could all be like that if they tried! Why are you two being so philosophical anyway?”

Volt didn’t really know. “Sometimes I just wish we had sleep dart guns or something, instead of needlessly killing these poor bastards. Maybe there’d be more Grineer defectors if we didn’t keep on killing them…”

A timer beeped, indicating that the hack was done. The mission was over and they could head to extraction. The only problem was that there were a bunch of Nox Grineer in the way. Rather than firing bullets, the Nox all fired balls of horrible, inky toxins, several of which landed all over the four Warframes’ feet.

“Those ones though, they can fucking go to hell!” Ember shouted as she fired her Tonkor grenade launcher at the Grineer. With a flash and a bang, all that was left was a cloud of green smoke.

Frost glared at Ember, then rolled his neural sensors.

“Come on, guys. Let’s get to extraction before more of those Nox show up…”