“Wow…”
“What?”
“WOW…”
“What?”
“WOW!!!”
Retvik tutted, rolling his eyes as something crashed behind him. “Litvir, what is wrong with you?”
Litvir pulled himself out of his chair and off the floor, having fallen back in shock. “I passed!”
“You passed what?”
“That insane time-based exam we took! I somehow passed!”
“We all somehow passed.”
Litvir rubbed his face, brushing off dust and dirt. “Yes, but for the non-godly beings that we are, these things still impress me. If you had asked me not too long ago about how time loops work, I would have looked at you with a blank stare and asked what you were on about! I consider it the antithesis of asking Arkadin about functions or object-orientated programming, something he clearly does not need.”
Retvik simply shrugged, sliding his clawed finger across the screen of his little computer, turning the page of the digital book he was reading. “You seem to not consider Arkadin very smart.”
“Not at all! Just very different variations of knowledge. There are things a god needs to know that a mortal does not, and vice versa. I have a masters in Rethan psychology and would not expect Arkadin to have a Lyceum diploma, and he would not expect me to know the best way to destroy a planet or be able to do so. Speaking of which…”
Litvir paused as the door opened up and Arkadin returned with a tray of food and drinks. It had been his turn to get refreshments, and Arkadin always, always delivered. This time round, he had brought three large caramel sodas and three portions of small chocolate gateau cake, each one topped with a personalized decoration.
“You want to know the best way to destroy a planet?” Arkadin asked. “Really depends on how ‘destroyed’ you want it. Quickest way is to throw it into the nearest star.”
Retvik tutted. “Oh no. We were just talking about levels of education.”
“How so?” Arkadin continued to ask as he placed the tray down on the nearest table, then threw himself into his personal chair. “Like, about that test?”
“Litvir has a masters in Rethan psychology and suggested you do not have any formal education.”
“Huh…” Arkadin shrugged. “Well, he’d be wrong. I have a Bachelor of Science in product design and olanet technologies, with honours.”
Litvir blinked. “You have a BSc? So what are you, Arkadin, Thantophor and God of Decay, BSc?”
“Well, technically it’s just Arkay, BSc, since I studied under the Open Skyan University.”
“And what about you, Retvik? What do you have?”
Retvik frowned, then tutted, then frowned again. “I just have a basic Lycuem diploma, like 99% of Rethavok.”
“That’s nothing to be ashamed of!” Arkadin smiled cheerfully. “Plus, really, out here, all our qualifications mean literally nothing. Soon, we’ll all be Decay Lords. And we’ll have our own ship and stuff.”
“I will be honest…” Retvik grunted as he sat up. “I am getting tired of studying. More exploration would be nice.”
“Oh, be careful with your words, Retvik!” Litvir hissed. “Studying may be boring, but it is definitely 99% safe. The last thing we need is to be stuck inside a massive, mind-hugging, squishy, horrible organic lump again.”
“True, true…” Retvik shrugged. “But a little bit of soft-core adventure would be nice…”