Unwanted Truth

“Arkay…”

Litvir knocked on the door, then paused, immediately losing his trail of thought. Arkay was sitting on his bed, clearly upset and angry, but also unable to release his anger. Several pillows had been thrown around, but Litvir noticed something else: there were small dents in Arkay’s forearm plating. He had been… biting himself?

“What, Litvir?”

“I, uh, came to check on you. You seemed very unhappy after… breaking the blood pact thing. Retvik somewhat dominated that previous conversation and I feel you wanted to say something.”

Arkay grunted, then laid down, not particularly interested, nor buying Litvir’s statement. “You didn’t get your question answered how you wanted it to be answered, and now you’re asking me.”

“Well…” Litvir remained in the doorway, tapping his fingers on the frame. He knew that entering Arkay’s room would only spell trouble. “Yes, that is also true. But despite what Retvik said about us being equal, I have a feeling that you don’t think that is the case.”

Litvir watched Arkay. He remained still, staring at the ceiling in his room, but his tail was twitching anxiously. A tongue briefly flicked out from Arkay’s mouth.

“It’s fine. I’m just tired.”

“It is not fine, you are not just tired.”

Arkay sat back up and stared at Litvir. “Fuck off. You got your hunk. You got what you wanted. I’m never going to get over myself, I’m never going to change, so you might as well have some fun until Retvik finds someone better.”

Litvir tutted. “I think you and I had two very different conversations. Retvik clearly started that he wanted the three of us to be equals and I am inclined to agree with him.”

“I’m not equal to you two. I am stupidly more powerful yet also a fucking retard who can’t have normal relationships. It’s probably a good thing that Galyn is going to package me up in a box and drop me off at daycare for idiots like me, so you two can have more time together!”

After a brief pause, taking a moment to digest Arkay’s rant, Litvir simply tilted his head to one side. “You really do lack any kind of confidence or self-worth.”

Arkay sighed, turning away, before lying back down again. “Yeah, I do. I hate myself. I thought, being out here and stuff, away from a shitty home and with some form of freedom, I’d change, I’d be better. Nope, turns out all the problems are my problems, that I do to myself.”

“I would recommend therapy. Because how you treat yourself is not healthy.”

“Hah, yeah, I know…” Arkay tutted. “I ain’t gonna do that though. I never do things that would clearly help me. I just let the problems get worse and worse until I explode and someone has to pick up the pieces.”

“Well then, maybe Galyn putting you in the care of someone else, someone who knows better, is a good thing?”

The little Decayling growled, then abruptly climbed out of bed, specifically so he could slam the door in Litvir’s face. Litvir rubbed his snout as he heard locking sounds on the other side, which slowly faded into tears.

“Does the truth hurt, Arkay?” Litvir asked.

“Yeah…” a timid reply drifted from behind the door. “It really does…”