“So, let me get this straight, because I don’t quite get this…”
Tenuk was tired. He’d just finished his shift and was about to go and get something to eat, but he was currently being held hostage by Teekay, who should have been going to bed now. The Thantir currently worked on five hour shifts, and closed for five hours a ‘day’, which, in this area of the Periuniversal Void, was about twenty hours.
“Take your time.”
“You… you want me to be a witness? To the certification of your marriage?”
Teekay nodded. Tenuk frowned.
“You do realize I am a Kronospast, yes?”
Teekay nodded again.
“A horrible, lying, cheating Kronospast?”
“Well, now you’re selling yourself short. You’re a Kronospast, yes, you’re an asshole, yes, but, like, as far as Kronospasts go, you’re definitely one of the better ones. You betrayed your own kind for the betterment of the universe, few people in general can say that.”
Tenuk tutted. “That’s all in the past. When the universe died, I went back to being an asshole.”
“Yeah but that’s not completely your fault!” Teekay tutted back. “Being an asshole is in your DNA. Plus, like the rest of us, you’re trying to cope with being the last of your kind, and that’s pretty tough. But, like, even Akah accepts you, and you Kronospasts nearly drove the Lanex to extinction.”
“I… I still don’t get why you’re asking me to be a witness though. Who else are you asking?”
Teekay hesitated, then shrugged. Tenuk probably needed to know. “We need three witnesses. Eksi and Kaytee are going to be my groomsmaids, and Elksia’s going to be our band-bearer. Phovos and Akah both accepted my request for them to be witnesses.”
“There are better people to pick than me.”
“Dude, no there ain’t. Sure, I gotta have Retvik or Litvir doing the certifying, and Elkay chose Litvir, but I want all the good positions to go to members of the Thantir Eight. Only reason I’m picking Kaytee as a groomsmaid is because I don’t want my groomsmaids to be taller than me.”
Tenuk blinked, then snorted. “Kaytee is ever so slightly taller than you. And it seems like a weird thing to be concerned about since your wife-to-be is way taller than you.”
“I’m going to wear platforms and full armour. Kaytee isn’t, apart from a shoulder plate. And…” Teekay paused. “It… it sounds weird, calling Elkay my wife. I mean, he will be… Dude, I’m finally marrying Elkay. It’s…” A very stupid smile grew across Teekay’s face. “I spent most of my life thinking I’d never find love, and I did. Sure, Elkay’s a Rethan, but, like… he’s kinda also a Skyan.”
Teekay’s smile was somewhat infectious. Tenuk couldn’t help but smile as well. When he and Teekay originally met, Teekay was a very strict individual, but after rediscovering his love for their fellow Divine Guardian Elkay, Teekay had finally loosened up and, well, started acting like a normal Skyavok.
“You seem so much happier now.”
“I really am!” Teekay grinned. “Sure, Elkay isn’t your standard partner, but I love him dearly, he loves me dearly and we’re going to finally make it official. After… what, four years? Maybe even longer, I don’t know any more. So will you be a witness for me? You’re one of the Thantir Eight, I wanted to ask you first. Especially since you’ve helped all of us, and you originally partnered us all up when we were Divine Guardians. Really, you got me and Elkay back together. Wouldn’t be here if it wasn’t for you.”
Tenuk shrugged. “I think you and Elkay would have gotten back together anyway. You guys were together before the universe ended. I just reassured you that it’s absolutely fine to love someone of a different race.”
“Still…”
“I’ll be blunt though, you did pick an absolute freak of a Rethan. One who can turn into other species if you’re looking to shake things up in the bedroom.”
Teekay laughed. “You’re absolutely right there! So, will you be a witness?”
“Yeah, I’ll be one of your three stupid witnesses. Kinda wondering why you asked Phovos and Akah first though.”
“I told you! I wanted to give all the good roles to the Thantir Eight.”
“Yeah but… what about Tahvra?” Tenuk asked.
That smile of Teekay’s grew bigger again. “Tahvra gets the best job. I was going to ask him to be a fourth witness, but, like, Tahvra doesn’t understand marriages. The guy’s stupidly smart but stupidly stupid at the same time, and, culturally, Vohra just… don’t get married. 99% of Vohra are born, neutered and then work to death, and the unlucky fuckers that gender male, don’t get neutered and become Vahrga don’t get any choices at all. That being said, Tahvra DOES understand sex, even if he sometimes forgets that kissing for the rest of us isn’t as lewd as it is for him.”
“So?” Tenuk was confused. “What does that have to do with anything?”
“I’m giving Tahvra the job of Sparkler.”
“I don’t know what that is.”
“You… don’t know much about Skyan weddings? Out of everyone here who isn’t a Skyan, I thought…”
Tenuk went back to shrugging. “I knew Psiksi, Eksi’s little brother, yeah, but I wasted my time trying to integrate into Rethan and Vrekan societies. And Psiksi, although he had a boyfriend, he never seemed to want to get married. Arkay only seemed to know as much about Skyavok society as he needed to blend in.”
“True, I guess. I never properly met Psiksi. I knew Arksi pretty well, he was Vice-Ksa of the Ξ-Class, we spoke regularly. Honestly, the All-Ksa’s four kids all hated him, but they were all as insane as Kayel was, and felt they HAD to get away because they were stuck under Veeyel’s shadow, even if the poor guy completely lost his marbles later on.”
“Gonna be blunt, I have no idea who Veeyel is. I met All-Ksa Kayel a few times, never met his, uh, husband?”
“Understandable. Veeyel was considered a national treasure, saved a bunch of people from a burning hospital in a terrorist attack but got brain damage in the process. When his kids all turned fifteen, Veeyel just, kinda, forgot everything and his health completely deteriorated. It’s why Kayel ran for All-Ksa, because he wanted better funding for our health services.”
Tenuk frowned. “I… never realized.”
Teekay shrugged yet again. “I wouldn’t expect you to know. Kinda mean of me to assume what a Sparkler is at a wedding too. The job of the Sparkler is to lay petals and glitter in front of the bride as they walk down the aisle and, when we kiss to seal the deal, they set off all the pyrotechnics.”
“That… that sounds like a fucking awesome job. I’m sure Tahvra will be thrilled!”
“Yeah, I didn’t want to not include him, even if he doesn’t understand these things…” Teekay paused. “My only problem is the complete and utter lack of, well, normal guests. It’ll literally just be the three big guys and Kal. And kinda Retvik? But Retvik will be walking Elkay down the aisle. Like, who do we invite?”
Tenuk thought to himself for a moment. “Well… Firstly we could go through the Thantir Wyvern server. That Saahro guy said he was heading here soon, might be some older folks we can invite. We could also invite the rest of Loopblade and maybe some other Phantai. Maybe just Moonblade, that guy was chill. I think Litvir knows a few people too?”
“Like who?”
Tenuk patted Teekay on the shoulder “That Theocydes guy. The weird Voidborn who warned us about Ahkron... I dunno, I’m sure we can find a few more people! Either way though, you need to go to bed, you’ve got a shift in five hours.“
“Ugh, yeah. Thanks for the help, Tenuk.”
“No worries, buddy. Have a good one!”
Teekay went back to smiling as he made his way towards his personal quarters. “Hah, thanks you too!”