“So, question, Ret. Have you ever flown a ship before?”
While Psiksi had managed to teach the basics to Nyssi and Kayel, and Tanos was already, Psiksi had noticed that Ret was much more uneasy.
“No…”
“Have you driven anything at all?”
Ret frowned. “The last time I personally drove a vehicle, I was squished up in the driver’s seat and accidentally ran over a corrupted monster.”
“Do you have a drivers’ license?”
“Yes.”
“Why don’t you drive then?” Psiksi asked.
More frowns. “Most Rethans use public transport. I cycled to work every day when I was a gladiator, before Nyssi, Kayel and Tenuk showed up.”
Psiksi didn’t mean to look both surprised and amused. Mostly because Psiksi was imagining Ret on a very small bicycle.
“I do not understand why others are so confused about most Rethans riding bikes and trikes or taking the bus to work rather than having individual motorized vehicles.”
“Because… most modern societies have cars?” Psiksi suggested.
“Cars are difficult and expensive and bad for the environment when 75% of all Rethans are are two and a half metres tall.”
“Oh. Good point, I guess. Anyway, back to learning! I am glad you already put your seatbelt on.”
Ret grunted. “Of course. We are flying, or rather, we are about to fly a ship, that I will most likely dent in some way.”
Psiksi eyed Ret a little bit, thought for a moment, then eyed Ret a little more.
“Ret, be honest with me for a moment. Are you alright?”
Ret hesitated. “Not really.”
“Alright,” Psiksi twisted his seat around so he could look at Ret directly. “Do you want to talk? You seem kinda upset and a little snappy. Normally, you are much perkier and less bothered about things. Is this because you’ve been asked to learn how to fly a ship and are stressed about it? Or is there something going on in the background?”
Ret fell silent, then twiddled his thumbs a little. But he didn’t seem to want to answer.
“What’s wrong, Ret? You can tell me, you know. You don’t have to hide if you’re sad.”
“It is multiple silly reasons. Not worth anyone else’s time.”
“We have a lot of time on our hands right now. I can keep it confidential if you want, just between you and me. Alright, sure, there’s like twelfty Psions here, including your cute boyfriend, but I won’t talk…” Psiksi paused briefly. “Are you having problems with Kuta?”
“No. Kuta and I are fine. That is one of the few things on my mind that I am satisfied with, but I am somewhat wondering if I can talk about specifics yet or if I should wait a little longer.”
“Ah, alright. So, that’s the obvious thing out of the way. Tell me, Ret, what’s bothering you?”
“It is a stupid thing.”
Psiksi put a hand on Ret’s knee. “We’re allowed to have stupid problems. When I arrived here, I had a stupid problem with Eksi, because neither of us knew the other was alive. Bottling stuff up never helps.”
“It is not something you can help with though.”
“Well, I don’t know until you tell me!”
Ret fell silent again, frowned some more, then sighed.
“You’re allowed to have problems and feelings and al that.”
With another sigh, Ret finally relented. “I feel homesick and I miss my little siblings.”
Psiksi shrugged. “Yeah, I totally get that. I am stupidly lucky that Eksi is alive, but Arksi and Thitaksi, they’re both dead and gone. Forever.”
Ret was about to say something else, but Psiksi’s comment made him pause. “Um… I… I think they might be still alive.”
“What?”
Ret glanced outside, at the black sky. “My universe was not destroyed. I was taken out of it. But… Nyssi explained it better… Your universe did not die, it was… rewritten? Remade? I am not sure. I think I told you that I knew a green-plated Psiksi, but I did not mention the other vok. Eksi was a gladiator trainer, Thitaksi represented Skya Dessaron One and Arksi was the Ksa of the Ξ-Class, or something like that. Thassalin and Arkay all say that no one really died, they were just given new lives. Kuta, Talok and Thassalin are proof of that.”
“Well… uh…” Psiksi found himself stuttering. “That… makes me feel a little less bad… But, going back to you, what are you homesick about?“
“Hmph. I left a lot of things behind. Sometimes I wish I was just a gladiator again, doing a simple job that I was very good at. I had friends who I fought alongside and against, occasionally. Relkir and Rethais were both talking to me again, and we had fixed our bloodline and family issues. My life was good. Really good. And it is all now gone forever, and I can never go back…”
Ret wiped a tear from his eye.
“Are you alright, Ret?”
“No. I lost my entire life, again. And if I did not have my friends and Kuta with me, I would have lost my mind too. I am normally fine, but sometimes I get sad because this is all so different and strange and unending. And now I have to sit here and learn how to fly a ship and nothing makes sense any more…”
Psiksi sighed, then got up and wrapped his arms around Ret. Ret quickly accepted the hug.
“I totally get how you feel. All this outside universe stuff is fucking insane and I’m genuinely surprised that you eight have been as calm as you all are. But how you feel isn’t a bad thing, it’s perfectly natural. And it’s natural to cry as well.”
Ret grunted. “I guess. But I feel stupid and sad right now.”
“You’re definitely not stupid…” Psiksi let go of Ret, then undid his seat belt. “We’re going to cancel this little lesson, you’re not in the right head space for this right now. How about we go and find your friends and sit down and talk with them? Would you like that?”
“I would, yes.“
“Well, let’s go and do that then. You can learn this ship stuff later on.”
Ret let Psiksi pull him up, then sighed and rubbed away any remaining tears. “You are oddly good at this mind therapy stuff…”
Psiksi smiled. “Yeah. Turns out, me and my brothers, we all trained in therapy and psychology for a bit during our last two years at school, before we decided to be gladiators. Come on now. Maybe we can get some ice cream too.”
Ret smiled just a little bit. “Thank you, Psiksi.”
“No worries, mate. This sort of thing is what us Thantir do best…”