Tale – Last Questions of the Campaign

The crowd died down as Elkay offered himself up for one last question. They had all been there for a few hours, asking questions about everything from increasing taxes on those earning over ten million a year to opening up adoption for all Rethans regardless of marriage status. Elkay had diligently answered every question, apart from ones related to security and intelligence, for obvious reasons. He’d done his best to move questions away from recent scandals, wanting to increase emphasis on his policies.

Now was time for one last question. Elkay scanned every member of the crowd, journalists from many races, not just Rethans. But the last question always went to a Rethan, that was just how things were. But one Rethan here today had been at every single event Elkay had done. A very… consistent journalist, Elkay had always secretly been a fan of Galion Feniarou’s writing, both fictional and non-fictional, even if Galion seemed to dislike Elkay quite a bit.

“Galion, you get the last question. What would you like to ask?”

Galion didn’t seem surprised that he had been picked. He always thought that perhaps the former Vice General was pandering to him. Today though, he had been given some information that he wanted to clarify.

“General Elkay, is it true that you are a virgin?”

The question was strange, and curious enough that everyone else went completely silent. Elkay though decided to answer straight away.

“I assume you mean the traditional definition of a virgin, having not had intercourse with any other being?”


Elkay shrugged. There was no harm in everyone knowing. “In that case, yes, I am a virgin. I am not sure what that has to do with anything, but oh well.”

The journalists all wanted to jump up, Elkay could see their excitement. He decided to answer a few follow-up questions, because he knew only bad things could come if he left them hanging.

“Why are you a virgin?” Galion asked. “Is no one good enough for you? Are you incapable of anything?”

Another shrug. “I care for a lot of Rethans. I love my family. I love my friends. I have feelings for others. But… Well, I guess I am just not interested in having sex. Not everyone is.”

“Are there underlying medical conditions that-”

Elkay sighed. “Galion, you know better than to ask about private things like that. No, I have no underlying medical conditions. And even if I did, that would be between me and my medic.”

“But won’t your lack of sex render you unable to legislate about things related to sex?” someone else shouted. Elkay didn’t see who it was.

“That is why we have advisors! They advise us on things we do not completely understand. If you do not mind me asking you all a question, does it really matter who I sleep with? Come to think of it, is it not better that I concentrate on my work rather than chasing love interests, or trying to cope with a broken heart? That is how I see things.”

“But General Elkay,” Galion asked. “How can you claim to feel love and want relationships if you’ve never felt the urge to-”

“I am going to interrupt you there, Galion!” Elkay tutted. “You are suggesting I am some sort of robot. Of course I have felt urges. That is wholly natural. I simply choose to not act out on them. Unlike SOME Rethans.”

Galion fell silent. Other beings tried to ask more questions, but Elkay wouldn’t let them. He wanted to close this all off.

“Thank you all for coming here. Our campaign is over, all we can do now is wait for the election and its results. I urge all Rethans to go out and vote on Sunday. I wish everyone the best of luck, and I thank all those who have supported me. Thank you very much!”

The journalists began to file out, satisfied with the many answers they had gathered. Galion though remained in his seat. Elkay waited until everyone else had left before he approached him.

“That was a silly question, you know,” Elkay tutted. “Seemed like a waste.”

Galion sighed. “I know. I don’t want you to win.”

Elkay’s tut turned into a smile. “Well, you know what to do. Vote for Photeianos on Sunday, that is what you want. I will not judge you either way. Now go home and see your family. You have been working too hard these past weeks. Go and rest.”

“I will…” Galion replied as he got up and left. “Good night, General Elkay…”

“Good night, Galion…”