“Esvee.”
“Is there a problem?”
“I need… I need a word. Yes, a word.”
“What is the problem?”
“I…”
“Envee, speak.”
“The voices. They’re back.”
“All of them?”
“Yes.”
“Including…”
“Yes. Especially that… I’m sorry…”
“Have you been taking your medication?”
“Yes. Always.”
“Three times a day?”
“Yes! OF COURSE… Sorry.”
“How long?”
“Most of them started popping back over the last week. That… one… came back this morning.”
“Has it…”
“No. Been rather quiet. Judgemental. Telling me I’m worthless. I can deal with that.”
“Does your brother know? Have you told the Generals? Anyone?”
“No. I came to you the second it… suggested I harm someone.”
“Harm who?”
“Myself.”
“We’re not doing this again, are we? The suicidal tendencies? The trying to throw yourself off bridges and the like?”
“Better than me harming someone else.”
“Envee.”
“Sorry. But it’s true.”
“Stop it.”
“Sorry.”
“Are the voices still speaking to you?”
“I told them to shut up. Then I took my tablets.”
“Maybe all you need is a bigger dose. And a power dampener, just in case.”
“That is fine by me. Sometimes I wonder if we are simply too powerful. If I can be trusted.”
“You are sane enough to realise you are ill.”
“Not a good thing either way.”
“It is better than nothing, Envee. We need to be appreciative of what we have.”
“Like what? You know those K-Class cunts are right, how we’re all essentially slaves to our masters, living and dying for them. Since when have our Generals ever cared about us? We work until we die then we get replaced by a new set of idiots who didn’t choose any of this either!”
“Envee, we’re the last of our kind. You know that?”
“Come off it. Once our Generals are out of the picture, the High General will just go back to stealing Threan-types from their mothers and turning them into monsters! Monsters like me!”
“Envee, stop!”
“No, YOU STOP. You stop apologizing for them. You…”
“Put the blade down.”
“You… I… I’m so sorry…”
“Do I need to take you in?”
“Oh Light, please no… I don’t want to be killed.”
“They won’t kill you. You’ll be assessed. Then they’ll decide what to do.”
“You know they’ll just have me killed. Probably via some stupid way. Or worse, they’ll stick me on a sedative drip until my body withers and dies. If I’m going to die, I want to die on my own terms. A quick death.”
“You won’t get that. But…”
“Don’t ‘but’ me. Please. I know I need to go in.”
“Stop it. They won’t kill you. There have been far worse cases than you. There are worse cases right now. Why do you think Thitavee-En is constantly on and off duty?”
“Because High General Photeianos threatened to kill him.”
“What? Where did you hear that?”
“Heard it from Eksi. His brother Arksi is married to Nenth, who said that Thitavee-En was temporarily assigned to the Θ-Class. He’s not mentally ill, he’s physically strained.”
“And you think Eksi is telling the truth? That Arksi and Nenth are?”
“Esvee, Nenth is a Θ-Class. They’re like, super smart. Know everyone and everything.”
“That…”
“Is worrying, yes?”
“Thitavee-En, there’s a reason they call him an ‘angel’. He’s never done anything wrong. Maybe I’ll get in touch with the R-Class and…”
“Please don’t tell them about me… I don’t want to ruin things.”
“Ruin things for you?”
“No. Not me. For our Generals.”
“I don’t understand, Envee.”
“What if someone finds out that I’m insane? Tut tut, I hear them say. Old General Rethais can’t keep his Ksa in order. And that Elkay, he can’t deal with his Ksa. If they can’t look after their Ksa, why are we trusting them? How can they run an empire if they can’t run their Ksa?”
“Envee, you’re overreacting.”
“But it might happen! At least… At least wait until after the elections. Win or lose. I don’t… want to be blamed for anything. I don’t want my stupid brain fucking it up for everyone else.”
“No one will blame you… Okay, fine… But you promise you will try your hardest to not…”
“Of course, Esvee. You have my word.”
“Very well. I’m going to increase your dosage on all your medication. Come see me later when I am sorting out the meds and I will give you your new stuff.”
“Okay. I have… a question though.”
“What is it?”
“It’s not just me who is losing his mind, is it?”
“What do you mean?”
“You give us all meds. You’re our team’s medic. It’s not just me?”
“Well… The sad thing is, Ksa are mentally unstable. Most of us just… hide it really well.”
“You’re…”
“Of course I am. There are very few Ksa who aren’t. They’re the lucky ones. They’ll be the last of us.”
“You think, Esvee?”
“There’s a reason most Ksa don’t live past 70, you know…”