“This is about that fucking stupid test, isn’t it?”
Elkay and Teekay both nodded. The seven Decaylings all glanced at each other nervously. Well, apart from Lissandra, who was standing there, with her arms crossed.
“Come on, out with it. We all know we all failed. We all know we fucked up.”
Vokulunaax and Vexer both nodded in agreement.
“That test was incredibly difficult…” Vexer muttered. “I’d be amazed if I scored more than 10 in that exam!”
Teekay suddenly snorted. Elkay nudged him, to try and keep Teekay professional. Teekay straightened himself out, then started handing envelopes to the class.
“Unfortunately, you’re pretty much spot on. Most of you failed. But that’s fine, because MOST people fail this test on the first try. Alright, Elkay’s smart, he passed first try, so did Akah and Elksia, for obvious reasons, but I passed on the second attempt. Most folks pass on the second or third attempt, it’s really nothing to be ashamed of.”
“I must ask though, why do they make it so hard?” Atteh’Kus grunted. “If it is expected to fail, then why not make the exam more manageable in some fashion?”
“Because there are secondary lessons to be taught,” Elkay explained. “The important lesson being that failure is not the worst thing in the world, that you will not always succeed, but you ought to try again, and reach for opportunities to fix mistakes. But also this time stuff is vaguely important as well and you ought to try and comprehend at least 35% of it.”
“Why 35%?” Helkas exclaimed. “That was a specific number. Also, I got more than 35%. I got 49%. I assume that’s still a fail though? I don’t remember school much but I’m pretty sure less than, like 50% was a fail.”
Teekay went back to smiling. “Well, fun fact, Helkas, you actually passed.”
“I did?”
“Yep. I said that MOST of you failed. Two of you didn’t. Which, in all honesty, a 2/7 pass rate is above average for groups and this exam.”
“What IS the average?” Atteh’Kus asked.
“About one in ten pass first try. Admittedly, us Thantir kinda screw with averages, because our Decayling class sizes are weird. Like, out last class sizes? Your class is seven, our last class was two (which was just Elkay-En and his half-brother Vekeus), then we had two classes of eight, then we had a class of three, which was Arkay, Retvik and Litvir’s class. If you can call that a class. And, admittedly, both Elkay-En’s class and Arkay’s class had 100% pass rates on the first try. Among mine and Elkay’s class, me, Tenuk and Eksi all scored 34% on our first attempt and Tahvra wasn’t that far off either, but, if I’m brutally honest, Kayel’s class was a hot mess outside of Kuta and Thassalin.”
“That being said, most of you were not that far off passing!” Elkay was more optimistic. “We will need to sit down with Kayenus to give him extra lessons, but the rest of you who failed, you should pass on the second attempt. The passing grade is 35% or above. And we are going to sit with you over the next few hours, go through the areas where you were nearly there, then try and go through the stupidly hard sections where you can get a few extra points for attempting to answer.”
“Hang on!” Vexer suddenly exclaimed. “I need OVER 35% or is 35% exactly enough to pass?”
“You need 35% or more,” Elkay explained. “I believe you got 35% exactly, yes, Vexer?”
“Yeah. I got 35%. Does that mean I passed?”
Elkay nodded.
“So… I passed?”
“Yes.”
“Really?”
“Yes.”
“Seriously?”
“Yes.”
“In all seriousness, I passed?”
Elkay eyed Vexer. Vexer was a little too shocked to noticed that Elkay was eyeing him.
“Vexer, you passed!” Teekay butted in. “You and Helkas both passed. Which means you both aren’t actually needed for this lesson we’re about to do.”
Vexer stared at his test results a bit more. “I fucking passed?”
“Are… are you alright, mister Vexer?” Helkas nudged the confused Vrekan.
“I… I’m fucking amazed…”
“Clearly!” Lissandra spat. “You’re both somehow smart enough to have passed and dumb enough to not realise it.”
“But… I was sure I got everything completely wrong!”
Teekay shrugged. “I mean, you got 65% of the test wrong, but you still did enough to pass. Either way, since you and Helkas passed, you may leave.”
“Leave?” Vexer blinked.
“Today’s lesson is about going over what you all did wrong during the exam, so you can try and pass the exam on the second attempt. Unless you want to do the test again, to try and improve your score, Vexer, you don’t need to be here.”
“Really?”
“Say really again and we will collectively hit you…” Vokulunaax growled.
Vexer shrugged. “Fair enough. I’m just absolutely mind-blown that I passed. So, like, are Helkas and I free to go?”
Elkay nodded. “You have two hours of free time. You may spend that time studying, but you may also spend it relaxing, if you so desire.”
Vexer thought for a moment, then turned to Helkas. “Kid, you want to go and get cupcakes? I want celebratory cup cakes. Maybe even a celebratory tres leches cake. And eat it on the beach. And I want to go and tell Elksia and Reksi too. Elksia will love the fact that I passed first try. Actually, have you even met Reksi?”
Helkas blinked, not really sure how to respond. “Uh… not properly?”
“Well!” Vexer grabbed Helkas by the hand and dragged him off. “We’re gonna get some cake then introduce you to Reksi. I bet she’d looooove to play with your stupidly long tail!”
Before Helkas could argue, Vexer had already dragged him out of the room and slammed the door shut.
“Is… is Vexer alright?” Kayenus eventually asked.
“Eh, he’s fine!” Teekay shrugged. “Let him have his one moment of brightness. In the mean time, we all have work to do…”