Tale – Kinisis’s Impossible Task

Kinisis felt miserable. Her Veth were being bitches, she was still sore from regrowing galaxies and everything was just about awful. The only thing she had to look forward to was an upcoming visit to the home of the Ostar. They were always fun. And loyal. And attractive. And up for sexy times. Only problem was, she had those new stupid Veth who needed training and the thing she’d normally use was being a cunt as always.

Something gently tapped Kinisis on the shoulder.

“Fuck off!” Kinisis replied, not turning around to see who it was.

“That is not very nice…” Kairos stuttered as he jumped back, nearly dropping a badly wrapped gift. The Dragon God of Time knew that he was far, far weaker than the Avatar of the Cycle. She could probably destroy him just by thinking about it.

Kinisis growled, then went bad to brooding. Kairos sighed, but didn’t go away. He remained where he was, just out of sight, patiently waiting for Kinisis to turn around.

Something else tapped Kinisis on the shoulder. Rather than snap at the perpetrator, Kinisis grabbed them by the arm and threw them over her shoulder.

“What in the name of me!” Stasis exclaimed as he landed with a thump and a thud, dropping what looked like a large bouquet of flowers. “What is wrong with you?”

Kinisis tutted, then turned so she wasn’t facing either of the deities.

“Kinisis!” Stasis shouted as he climbed to his feet. “You are miserable and you are not doing your duties properly! What is wrong?”

Kairos sighed, then stood next to Stasis, mostly for protection. “She is angry that her Veth do not do as she wants them to. Mostly her pretty little Veth prime. He saves her, she hits him.”

Stasis also sighed, then nodded in agreement. “It is weird. Those Veth sacrificed themselves, and all Kinisis does is scorn them. They deserve at least some better treatment. But alas, it is not just Kinisis’s fault. I failed too. I messed up…”

“Is that why you bring flowers?” Kairos smiled.

“Indeed.”

The Lords of Time and Entropy glanced at Kinisis, then back at each other.

“She is angry.”

“Indeed.”

Without warning, Kinisis jumped up, wrapping black, inky tendrils around Stasis’s and Kairos’s throats.

“Are you both insulting me? ARE YOU?”

Kairos shook his head as best he could, but Stasis remained firm, breaking free of Kinisis’s grasp.

“Yes, I am. I am insulting you, Kinisis. You are a moody, grumpy bitch right now who is not doing her job and is sulking rather than celebrating the fact that you and the rest of this universe is alive. You and I both know that the alternative would have been horrible had your Veth not acted how they did.”

Kinisis sighed, then let go of Kairos, dropping him on the ground on top of the bouquet Stasis had brought.

“I’m angry at you, Stasis. You didn’t do enough.”

Stasis lowered his head. “I know. I wanted to make it up to you. Hence the flowers which… Oh…”

Kinisis stared at the two beings. “You want to make me happy?”

“I always want to make you happy. I want to be your partner…” Stasis admitted.

“I do too!” Kairos interrupted. “I’d do anything for you if I could!”

“Anything?” Kinisis asked.

“Anything…” Stasis replied.

Kinisis fell silent and began to think to herself. After a moment, something flashed in her eyes. An idea.

“You know what would make me happy?” Kinisis asked, a tiny, slightly evil smile growing on her face.

“What, my dear?” Stasis asked.

“I want you two to fuck. Hardcore all-in sex. And I want it recorded so I can watch it again in the future. That is what would make me happy. Sex is what I want right now. Well, other beings having sex. I like watching that stuff.”

Stasis’s mouth moved but nothing came out. Kairos’s jaw hung open in shock. Kinisis continued to smile, before going back to her normal frown. Her brief amusement had faded already. She was certain they wouldn’t do it.

“I doubt you two would ever comply though. If you did, I’d totally not hit you two or anything. At least for a few years. Assuming neither of you do anything retarded. I reserve the right to beat you both up if you do stupid things. But yeah, you two work out who’s fucking who, I’ve got to go back to work.”

With a flicker of a smile, Kinisis disappeared in a cloud of black smoke, leaving Kairos and Stasis where they were, frozen in place, their mouths hanging open.