“I am so, so fucking stupid…”
Elkay had been muttering those words for a while now, still under the effects of the anaesthetic drugs the medics had used on Elkay’s sudden surgery. He’d been conscious but numb and drunk, watching as two surgeons removed dead, necrotic organs from Elkay’s stomach cavity, organs Elkay had accidentally created for himself when he’d shapeshifted into a Beh’evok. His own fast healing abilities had worked against him, targetting the unnatural, non-Rethan organs as a cancer and cutting off the blood supply to them.
Of course, being a pretty typical Rethavok, Elkay had just ignored the pain in his abdomen until it was too late. But again, his fast healing abilities had made surgery a massive issue, as the incisions were healing up faster than the surgeon could make them, and the initial anaesthetic hadn’t worked at all.
“You are not stupid. Not in the slightest.”
After the surgery, Elkay had been placed inside a private recovery ward, far away from everyone else. But they’d allowed one person to stay by Elkay’s side as he healed. Unfortunately that one person was Litvir, a psychotic, telepathic Rethavok not at all known for his bedside manners. That being said, Litvir had remained by Elkay’s side the entire time, holding his hand as it flopped out of bed.
“I am fucking stupid. Cannot even be a proper Rethan. Never was a proper Rethan.”
“Again, that is not true, dear.”
Really, Elkay wasn’t sure why Litvir was there, and why Litvir was insisting on keeping in constant contact with Elkay in some way. Elkay didn’t really like this. Rethavok were a warm-blooded species but their thick, rubbery skin meant they were never particularly warm to the touch. Litvir on the other hand was always so, so cold. It occurred to Elkay that maybe that was the reason why Litvir had formed a close relationship with Elkay’s half-brother Retvik, because Retvik was always so hot. Elkay though, he had always been a little too hot or a little too cold. He’d never fit in among other Rethans. He was short, he’d been born with wings and he had telepathy and telekinesis ever since he was a teenager.
“Of course it is true!” Elkay hissed, then regretted doing so. He was in a lot of pain. Mostly a constant, dull ache that would randomly intensify around certain organs. “I am a more convincing Beh’evok than I am a Rethan! I was always too small! People would accuse me of being a damn hybrid on the regular!”
“You were the High General, of course people would accuse you of things, because they wanted to belittle you, because they were envious. And you call yourself a freak when you are literally lying next to a particularly freakish Rethan.”
Elkay glanced to one side. Litvir tightened his grip on Elkay’s hand. Admittedly, the coldness of Litvir’s skin was somewhat refreshing.
“I recall you being larger and bulkier. Back when we were mortal. I am pretty sure you were one of those 3m-tall behemoths. Like Gath was, except also vampiric.”
“You would be correct.”
“I understand losing muscle mass but you are shorter now.”
Litvir snorted. “This is not actually my body. I am pretty sure the body you see here is my twin sibling Kuta’s body. When Kuta, Retvik and Trismit killed me, Trismit sliced my head off, but both my body and Kuta’s body were put into cryostasis for study, because we were Kaldieridoi. The Voidlord… found my consciousness inside the digital matrix Kuta and I created but downloaded me into the wrong body.”
Elkay blinked. To him, discovering Litvir’s true bloodline was more troublesome than the fact that Litvir had been accidentally body-swapped by a Voidborn. “You are a Kaldieridos?”
“Uh… yes… yes I am…” Litvir muttered. All Litvir’s confidence and swagger had disappeared.
“You do realize…”
“I know that Siona Kaldieridos was a traitor to our kind, yes. Which is why Kuta and I dropped a building on his head, changed our surnames and joined the 11th Legion in a desperate bid to control our telepathic powers. You do not need to remind me, Elkay.”
Elkay continued to eye Litvir. There were a few famous and infamous Rethan bloodlines, Elkay was well aware of this, because he was part of the famous Rethianos bloodline. However, the Kaldieridos bloodline was genuinely horrific, consisting of nothing but hideous, mutated monsters, hell-bent on killing other Rethans, at the behest of their awful mother. Technically, it wasn’t even a bloodline, since it only spanned two generations, but all known Kaldieridoi were considered enemies of the state. Sure, the Rethavok as a species no longer existed, but the fact that a Kaldieridos managed to make it to the rank of General and did so undetected bothered Elkay somewhat.
Then again, the Kaldieridoi did somewhat kill themselves, as Litvir had just mentioned, so that wasn’t too bad. Elkay calmed down a little, no longer feeling too awful about himself.
“For a Kaldieridos, you are not too hideous and mutated and ugly.”
“Well, Kuta was not too hideous.”
“Even back in your old body, you were just… bulky.”
Litvir tutted. “The only reason why a handful of us younger monsters are not so monstrous is because Siona realized he needed some normal-looking beings to do espionage work. Which is why Kuta and I have telepathy.”
“How many of your kind survived?” Elkay couldn’t help but ask. Having Litvir spill his guts was an amazing distraction. If anything, Elkay was feeling better already.
“Well, technically, none of them, aside from Kuta and myself. From my discussions with Kuta, the Kaldieridos bloodline does not exist in their new universe. On top of that, I used my control of the 11th Legion to track down and tag or kill anyone who survived the demolition of Siona’s headquarters. Those of us who assisted in Siona’s downfall, I tried to recruit, but Velir fled to neutral territories and changed his name and, despite my attempts to help them, both Zakir and Frektir ended up killing themselves out of shame and fear.”
“Oh…” Elkay frowned. “I am sorry. And I apologize for bringing up what are potentially painful memories.”
Litvir laughed somewhat, a reaction Elkay didn’t expect. “It was eighty years ago. I survived. I am mostly over it. Was a monster myself anyway.”
“Have you told Retvik about this?”
Litvir’s eyes widened, panic flashing in them, but Litvir did quickly settle back down. “Uh, no, I have not. But I will. You though, you consider yourself a freak and a monster when you clearly are not, you just have abilities you cannot properly control yet.”
“You always drag things back to me.”
“You are the special one here. You are also the one currently recovering from surgery, so I will not be too mean.”
“I am fucking st-”
“I have said this repeatedly, you are not stupid. And, technically, you are a better shapeshifter than Tenuk is because you turned yourself into a Beh’evok, while Tenuk just looks like one.”
Elkay tutted, however he quickly relented. “Still, I did hospitalize myself. And Tenuk is not as good as his sibling Levik was. He fooled me into thinking he was a Vahrga.”
“Tenuk also cannot shapeshift into a convincing Rethavok…” Litvir smiled. “Despite his years in self-exile among us, he never figured out the Rethan Secret until Lord Kenon ruined it for everyone. Still, Tenuk does have talent, and he has traits you could learn.”
“Like what?”
“Like, as Tenuk would say, not giving a fuck. Somewhat related, have you messaged Arkay yet?”
Elkay grunted. He wanted to cross his arms in disapproval but his left arm was currently secured to the bed. “No.”
“Why not?”
“I have unresolved personal issues with Arkay.”
“Hah!” Litvir laughed. “Dear, we all do. I will be the first to admit that I had a weird crush on Arkay when we were Decaylings. And before you say anything, I will definitely take a moment to remind you that your partner is a Skyavok, something Arkay has always taken the form of…” Litvir trailed off briefly. “Now that I think about it, maybe I have always been sexually attracted to Skyavok. Was always too busy working though to chase romance when I was mortal. Personal issues aside, you cannot solve them by ignoring Arkay and, because Arkay is a mimic hybrid like yourself, he can give you advice to not be as fucked up as he is.”
“Still…”
“Still, what? Although I must admit, Arkay does seem much more stable than he used to be. Although I am only going via voice chats and text messages.”
Elkay gave in. “Fine. I will speak to Arkay. But I need to rest. And I am sick of you holding my hand.”
“Would you rather hold my hand or Retvik’s hand? Physical contact is far better at reaffirming who you are than simple conversations anyway.”
“Good point. Can I rest now?”
Litvir smiled some more. “Of course. I could do with stretching my legs anyway. Rest well, dear.”
Elkay sighed with relief as Litvir let go of his hand, then stood up and wandered off. While Elkay did want to get up and leave as well, he did appreciate the peace and quiet. However, after only a few moments, Elkay found himself feeling lonely. With one final sigh, Elkay awkwardly reached for his communicator, and decided to send a message or two.