Grumpy Kronospast

Phovos frowned as she peered into the fridge. It was filled to the brim with food and drinks, but none of it was anything she wanted. This particular fridge would magically refill itself with whatever the being opening it wanted. However, the magical refilling powers were meaningless if Phovos didn’t know what she wanted.

“You done sucking all the heat out of the room?” Tahnahos grunted from behind her.

“Do you want something?” Phovos tutted back, not appreciating Tahnahos’s tone. Ever since the six of them had been stationed at this southern outpost, Tahnahos had been a particularly grumpy guy. While the others had mostly just ignored Tahnahos’s temper, Phovos was beginning to get annoyed. “Or are you going to be your standard asshole self?”

“Am I really being an asshole when I just want a damn beer and you’re blocking access to the fridge?”

“Yeah. You could just ask and I could just pass you a beer…” Phovos tutted some more. “Dark or light?”

Tahnahos fell silent, before quietly answering. “Dark, please…”

With a small smile, Phovos handed Tahnahos the drink he requested, then grabbed one for herself. A sugar-free energy drink with plenty of stimulants in it. Phovos had been rather sleepy lately, and was supposed to be staying awake for that night’s guard duty.

“So, you want to talk about why you’re being such an asshole lately?” Phovos grunted, making her way over to the nearest sofa. She snapped back the ring pull and took a large glug of her drink, staring Tahnahos down. After a moment of Tahnahos fidgeting nervously and struggling with a bottle opener, he joined Phovos on the sofa.

“Well, it’s mostly jealousy and anger and envy, if I’m honest.”

“Jealousy about what?” Phovos sweetened her own tone. Now that she was getting Tahnahos to open up, she didn’t want to antagonize him.

“Mostly about Relkir and Teekay. They’re a cute couple and I’m envious of them. I’m a social being and I don’t have anyone to be social with. And the one being I actually have experience pretending to be… is busy fucking a Skyavok.” Tahnahos sighed, taking a sip of his beer. “Now I’ve said that out loud, I sound like a fucking retard.”

“So you’re lonely. And horny?”

Tahnahos frowned. “Horniness I can deal with whenever. I’m a Kronospast, we used to literally have laws against reproducing, that’s not the problem.”

Phovos leaned back, downing more of her drink. “So what IS the problem?”

“I miss all the other stuff. The going to bars, the socialising, the spending time getting drunk and chatting up other creatures. Could have done this sort of social stuff with you, but I’ve been such an asshole lately that none of you want to spend time with me. Not that I blame most of you, since I’m blatantly a Kronospast now.”

“You want to go back to pretending you’re a Rethavok?”

“Nah…” Tahnahos tutted. “It’s obvious to you all that I’m not. The spell’s been broken already. Does bother me a bit though, since I spent a little too long refining my Tenuk persona, only for it to be chucked away by Kinisis. Now I have go back to being Tahnahos and I hate being Tahnahos.”

Phovos hesitated, then put her drink down, leaning closer to Tahnahos. “You hate yourself?”

Tahnahos shook his head a little. “Not hate-hate. Not like… some people. It’s more that being Tenuk was cool and exciting and I was a hero and popular and sexy and shit. And now I’m just boring Tahnahos with no friends and no social life and no one to go on dates with and just talk to.”

The Kronospast Guardian trailed off, staring into his drink. Phovos didn’t have anything to say at first, but she did feel sorry for Tahnahos. He was right, they had all suffered somewhat, having left their old lives behind.

Finally, Phovos spoke, having gathered her thoughts. “Well… there’s not much I can do to fix our lost pasts… Nor am I into any funny business… but if you want, we could have a little date night or something. Just you and I, out on a date on the glass balcony out there.”

Tahnahos glanced up at Phovos. “You… would do that for me?”

“Yeah. After all, we both kinda need a social life. Can’t spend forever being strangers, right?”

Tahnahos smiled, the first time in a while. “I… I don’t know what to say… thank you…”

“You’re welcome!” Phovos smiled back. “That being said, you need to go to bed. It’s gonna be your shift soon.”

With some more smiles, Tahnahos got up and did as he’d been told. “Yeah, you’re right. Thank you, Phovos. I really appreciate this…”