Plans for Good and Bad

Kayel slammed down the communicator, then sheepishly picked it up again. He had just got off the phone with Tenuk Diplastron Theanon, the eldest member of the Dessaron, the renowned traveller who had visited each of the Gods in turn. Kayel had hoped that the Deiton would tell him how to meet up with the God of Death in person, but Tenuk had been weirdly cold and defensive. Even in spite of the fact that Kayel hadn’t told him his plan, he’d just briefly mentioned that he wanted to meet the monster that had nearly killed him.

It was time for another tactic. One that Kayel wasn’t looking forward to. He glanced at a number on his desk, then swiftly entered it.

The line rang. And rang. And rang. After twenty rings, it cut off.

Kayel tried again. He was the All-Ksa of the Skyavok. He expected people to answer his calls.

Fifteen rings, and this time there was an answer.

“Hello, Psiksi.”

“Oh Void…” Psiksi seemed out of breath. “You caught me at a pretty bad time…” Psiksi hesitated, not sure what word to use.

“I did?”

“Mum, I have a partner. You know partners do things.”

Kayel smiled. His youngest was always a bit of a loner, so the fact that he was making friends and doing what Kayel always promoted filled him with joy. “Can I take five minutes of your time?”

“Uh, no.”

“You don’t have time for your All-Ksa?”

“For fuck’s sake…” Psiksi lowered his voice. “I was enjoying myself. And you had to ruin it. I should have guessed.”

“You’re alone.”

“I’m not! Kass is… Kass is waiting for me to come back so we can snuggle. What the fuck do you want?” Psiksi’s mood had turned sour. Kayel didn’t really care that much. For years, his own kids had looked down on Kayel for what he did for a living. As far as Kayel was concerned, this was just a small taste of revenge. Oh and a quest for information. Kayel had nearly forgotten about that.

“I just want to know about what you know about the Thantophor. From what Tenuk said to me, the Lord of Death itself chose you-”

“I’m not allowed to talk about that any more. Tenuk’s fucking pissed off at me because I stole his little tea strainer and tried to speak to the Thantophor… I mean, he’s a nice enough guy when he’s not insane… Wait…” Psiksi paused. “Why do you want to know? Are you plotting some kind of revenge for what he did?”

“I am.” Kayel decided just to play things straight. He knew Psiksi could normally see through his words. “We lost a lot of good Skyavok. Directly because of the Thantophor.”

“And you’re, what, going to try and kill him?”

“No, I’m going to break his heart.”

“Do you think that’s a good idea?”

“Are you on his side?” Kayel hissed.

“Don’t be silly!” Psiksi hissed back. “Everyone in the universe is against Arkadin, but we’re all dumb if we think hurting the Thantophor is going to make him go away. He’s an immortal, unkillable death god, it’ll just piss him off and make him kill more!”

“So what do you suggest, Monsieur All-Knowing?” Kayel growled. He didn’t like the way his own kid was talking to him.

“I dunno. You tried maybe just loving him and fucking him, like you do with all your problems?”

A light bulb lit up in Kayel’s mind. Psiksi was thinking the same way he was, but with less malice. And he was right, malice was not the Skyavok way. Kayel needed to look at this from the angle of love.

“Well… I would need to be able to meet with the Thantophor first…” Kayel tutted.

“I… I can’t help you with that… Not right now at least…” Psiksi lowered his voice again. “But… if you promise not to do something negative to the Thantophor, which would be stupid of you and might get us all killed… Maybe I can do some digging… I mean… the Thantophor IS lonely…”

“That would be perfect, my kid…” Kayel grinned. “I’ll leave you to your evening… Have fun!”

Psiksi sighed down the phone. “Yeah. I will. Just work out what the fuck you’re going to do, alright?”

“I will. Bye, Psiksi.”

“Bye, mum…”